Monday, 4 November 2013

Review: Dethklok - Doomstar Requiem Opera

Disclaimer: there are minor spoilers.

Let me just get this out of the way, I love Metalocalypse and Dethklok. I've bought all three of their albums, seen every single episode of the show and I can play a few songs on guitar (minus Brendon Small's ludicrously complex solos). For the uninitiated, Metalocalypse follows the fictional band Dethklok. They're the most popular form of music in the world and fans regularly die at their shows. Hell, in the first episode, people are crushed under a stage dropped from a goddamn helicopter the size of a cruise liner! Fans of Metalocalypse are some of the most patient in the world of TV and the metal community as a whole loves them. They're the ones that really got me into death metal! "What's the point of telling us that? I really care about this fake band." you might be wondering. Well, my sarcastic dick of a reader, the point was for you to understand what kind of impact this has had on metal and me. Which is why Doomstar Requiem was such a massive letdown (for me).


Metalocalypse is first and foremost a comedy show that just happens to have music in it. It's always been so over-the-top ridiculous and that's what draws a lot of people to the show. It's gotten to the point where someone being disintegrated by magic is considered tame! For example, it could be crushed by giant ice shards, electrocuted or mauled by ravenous cats. That's what we expected from the show, and we did get a bit of it (Nathan's jazzy song "How Can I Be a Hero?" was pretty funny) but not much considering the show is normally packed with jokes, even more than a pornstar is packed around four guys. From a comedic standpoint, it's shakier than me without caffeine. Don't mess with a junkie!


So if the jokes were mediocre, then is the story any good? Not really. The first 20 minutes (read, first half) was all build up. Considering we've been waiting for this damn thing for 15 months now, that's too much time! And the constant teasing from Brenden Small didn't help. Imagine you're told that a supermodel is going to come over to have sex. Over the next months she tells you how awesome she's going to be in the sack, then you finally get to doing the deed and then you've built it up so much in your head that she sucks and you're not even sure if you're going to climax properly! Where the hell was I going with that? Never mind. Story was predictable, except for what happens to Ofdensen and most of it was pointless. The general and chairman don't do anything, there's a cliffhanger involving Murderface and everything else goes back to the status quo of season 4. Brenden Small, I get that you did everything and at least half of the voices, but is there any way you could've made it better? Would that be okay?


What's really left after that? Well what do you think it is? The catering? It's the soundtrack! That's the one pretty good thing about it. Keep in mind Doomstar Requiem is a rock opera. Don't go in expecting much death metal. Think less Amon Amarth, more Jesus Christ Superstar. When you think of it like that, it's pretty good. Ofdensen's voice actor (it's Brenden Small; are you really surprised at this point?) can sing pretty well in his voice, like most of the others. Skqwisgaar and Murderface still sound weird but Brenden can't sing in all of his voices so I'll give him that.

All in all, I say watch it once and then get the soundtrack so it makes more sense. Sorry it's more info than humour this week, I'm still kind of drained from last week. The main reason I did something involving Metalocalypse was because I thought it would cheer me up but St. Anger has a way of giving someone PTSD.

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